I HAVE ALWAYS ENJOYED GOING TO NEW

DESTINATIONS...I RECALL AT A VERY YOUNG AGE TAKING THE GRAND CENTRAL ALONE, BOARDED AT THE GLENWOOD STATION IN YONKERS, NY, TO VISIT MY MATERNAL GRANDMOTHER IN OSSINING NEW YORK, TO WIN HER LOVE.

SHE MUCH PREFERED "BUNNY", MY OLDER BROTHER'S NICKNAME THAT SHE HAD GIVEN HIM, THAN TO ME...UNDERSTANDABLY BECAUSE I WAS A WEIRD KID...IN LOOKS AND ACTION...AND THOUGHT. I WAS DETERMINED TO CLEAN HER WINDOWS OF THE BACK ROOM OF MY GRANDFATHER'S WORK ROOM. HE WAS A CARPENTER, AND HE SMOKED A PIPE AND CIGARS...AS WELL AS BEING A MINISTER ON THE WEEK-ENDS TO BRING IN EXTRA CASH TO SUPPORT HIS FAMILY.

I HAD MADE THE DECISION THE NIGHT BEFORE WHILE SLEEPING IN THE CONVERTED CLOSET WHICH SERVED AS MY BEDROOM, WHILE MY BROTHER SLEPT ON THE BACK PORCH, OFF FROM THE KITCHEN, WHILE MY PARENTS SHARED THE ONLY BEDROOM, AND WE ALL SHARED THE SMALL BATHROOM SUITABLE FOR JUST ONE.

I GLANCED OUT THE WINDOW SEEING THE NEW JERSEY SHORE LINE, AND WHEN I GOT BORED WITH THAT VIEW I TURNED TO THE OPPOSITE SIDE WINDOW WATCHING AS LEAVES WERE QUICKLY AND PAINLESSLY BEHEADED FROM THE VINES THAT LINED THE BRICK WALL. I LIKED THE MOVEMENT OF THE TRAIN, IT ROCKED BACK AND FORTH, SIMILAR TO THE ACTIVITY THAT WOULD PUT ME TO SLEEP AT NIGHT, AND WHAT WOULD BRING ME SOLACE DURING THE DAY, USUALLY WHEN ARRIVING HOME FROM SCHOOL.

YES, I WAS A ROCKER, AND IT PREVENTED ME FROM THOROUGHLY JOINING THE HUMAN RACE, YET IT TOOK ME OUTSIDE AND WAY BEYOND MYSELF HURLING ME IN TO THE STRATUSPHERE, WHERE DANGEROUS ELEMENTS IMAGINED, WOULD EVENTUALLY LULL ME TO SLEEP.

WHO I THOUGHT WAS MY OWN MOTHER'S MOTHER WAS A LARGE WOMAN WHO HAD THE HOBBY OF GARDENING HER WHITE AND PINK ROSES, COOKING MEALS THAT WOULD BE ENVIED BY THE VERY BEST RESTAURANTS OF PARIS, AND HER LAUGHTER WAS INFECTIOUS AS HER BODY RESPONDED, CHUCKLING TOO.

I LOOKED UP AS SHE STOOD IN THE DOORWAY OF THE UNUSUALLY CONSTRUCTED HOUSE, SAYING, "HI NANNA, I'M HERE". AS THOUGH SHE HAD BAD EYE SIGHT, WHICH SHE DIDN'T. I RUSHED IN PASSING HER, SHE WAS SILENT AS I COULD FEEL HER WATCHING MY BACK AS I SPED DOWN THE HALLWAY AND DOWN THE STAIRS THAT WOULD LEAD ME INTO THE DINING ROOM, THROUGH THE KITCHEN, AND THE DEN, WHILE THE SMELL OF CHERRY PIPE TOBACCO HAD ACTUALLY COMFORTED ME...

I SMILED SEEING THAT SHE HAD OBEYED MY INSTRUCTIONS SEEING THE WINDEX, CLOTHS, AND USED NEWSPAPERS PILED UP WAITING FOR ME. I YELLED OUT, "THANKS NANA", NO RESPONSE, YES, SHE WAS INDEED A LARGE, QUIET WOMAN. WHEN I HAD FINISHED MY TASK, AND I HAD ASKED HER TO COME LOOK, I COULD HEAR AND FEEL THE FLOOR OF THE DEN GIVE IN TO HER WEIGHT. SHE ENTERED, QUIETLY OF COURSE, TAKING TIME TO CHECK OUT THE QUALITY OF THE WORK, GETTING CLOSE ENOUGH, IF SHE WANTED TO, TO ACTUALLY SNIFF THE GLASS.

AFTER A COUPLE OF MINUTES AT MOST, SHE TURNED AND LOOKED DOWN AT ME, AND I SAW THE BEGINNING OF A SMILE, AS SHE NODDED, AND SAID, "THANK YOU. THEY LOOK MUCH BETTER."

AND BEFORE I LEFT TO GET BACK TO YONKERS LOOKING FORWARD TO THE TRAIN RIDE, SHE CALLED MY MOTHER FROM AN UPSTAIRS PHONE AND OF COURSE I EAVESDROPPED, ..."SHE DID A GOOD JOB...". OF COURSE I SMILED BROADLY BECAUSE AT THAT TIME IN MY LIFE, AT THE AGE OF ABOUT EIGHT OR SO, I WAS DESPERATELY SEARCHING FOR ANY KIND OF PRAISE AND RECOGNITION.

(C)COPYRIGHTED BY GWEN MITCHELL, AKA GWENDOLYN AT THE WEST HOLLYWOOD PUBLIC LIBRARY, WEST HOLLYWOOD, CA 90069, USA AT 1/24/17 AT 4:09 PM.